Many celebrate the day they got baptized as their commitment to God, but my baptism wasn’t real, it was simply me trying to be spared from hell. But today I celebrate 2 years of Celibacy (My Celibaversary) yay!!…. and for me this day is far more significant because on November 12, 2013 I made a vow to God that I would not have sex until I got married and this was the beginning of my commitment,that I will surrender my life to God ‘for real’.
Honestly, I lived a promiscuous life for so long that I knew my two biggest challenges with being a Christian would be giving up sex and partying. So in order for me to really stick to this commitment, I would need ‘divine intervention’. Today I’m very proud of myself and I know God is proud of me too for taking the step to glorify Him with my body and not live in hypocrisy and lukewarmness anymore.
” I have been crucified with Christ, and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me” – Galatians 2:20
I remember a series of events led up to this decision; after my ‘failed’engagement (see story here My Engagement Story), I had either to go back to the my familiar place of being the side chick (see story here Being the Other Woman) or face the fears of singleness. So I took the easy route and went back… this lasted a month because I had such a strong conviction, I spent everyday being angry or depressed and I really wanted out!!
The HOLY SPIRIT IS SO REAL!!!
When I told my friends, of course they laughed at me and when I told him he laughed harder as everyone said they would give me two (2) weeks for the ‘holiness’ to wear off before I would go back to normal i.e. stuck in this relationship. But years later, apparently I had just gotten ‘crazier’ lolol…..
It is such an awesome and liberating feeling though to not be a slave to sin..
So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed (John 8:36)
Now let me say this … it ain’t me… This is only possible through the blood of Jesus Christ and it is only because of His Grace which is truly sufficient (2 Corinthians 12:9). The Holy Spirit has really taught me self-control and kept me during these 24 months.
I’ve been asked if I’ve ever felt tempted .. ahhh ..YES!! Mostly in the earlier stage… but I researched so many Blogs and YouTube videos on Purity that I’ve learned to flee from sexual immorality (1 Corinthians 6:8). I ensure I don’t put myself in certain compromising situations that would tempt me to fall. I will share another blog on Purity soon, but today I want to share 2 major lessons I’ve learnt during my celibacy journey:
1) SEX DOES NOT EQUAL LOVE 
I didn’t grow up in church, so not having sex before marriage was definitely not taught to me. Personally, I just needed to wait until I was at least 16 years old and ensured I didn’t get pregnant or my father would kill me. Since I didn’t know the Author of Love, of course love was showed through SEX. After being in a relationship for seven (7) years, I really wonder if either of us really were in love because according to 1 Corinthians 13 .. that’s a big NOPE!! We failed that love test for sure!!
It is a bit sad looking at it now, because the risks I took with my life of probably catching HIV or STD … dammm!!! SIN CAN REALLY BLIND YOU…
A man can be in love with the sex and not with you. If you only went on a few dates he does not even really know you, he knows what you show him. If you sleep with him that can clog up his thinking. That is why later down the road when he realizes he wasn’t in to you, he was just into the sex, he moves on to the next one. A few dates or even a few years does not mean a man knows you or loves you. So do it God’s way. God will give you what you need.
I’ve learnt that a guy that truly cares about you will a) Wait for sex – sex truly complicates things as we are driven by emotions and lust that we are blinded from the true intentions of this person. b) If he really wants you, he will put a ring on it! c) If he doesn’t know God, he truly cannot know love.
2) IF YOU DON’T KNOW YOUR WORTH, YOU WILL SETTLE FOR ANYTHING.
My worth was wrapped up in education, career and accomplishments. So I didn’t even realize that I didn’t know who I was or what I was about. In order for us to know our true worth, we must know GOD. When you know your worth, you will not settle to be a man’s side-chick, baby-momma, friend with benefits, ‘ride n die’ or even his girlfriend… if that man truly wants you, he will make you his wife.
As mothers, it’s obvious we have a certain level of sexual experience and the enemy will try to use this to get you to start thinking that you are not worth the wait. You can have 2 or 5 children, you are more than worth it to GOD!! So you have to continuously renew your mind that you are a new creation and God has completely restored and forgiven you. Look at these Scriptures and see what God says about you .. and GOD is not man that He can lie!!!
(Hosea 14:4, Ezekiel 36:25 & 2 Corinthians 5:17).
So today I share this blog, not to seem like I have it all together because I’m a work-in-progress… but I really want to encourage someone (male & female) to choose Purity over Pleasure!
Sex might be pleasurable but the penalty can be so detrimental. Sinning against your body (the temple of God) leaves so much scars and can truly mess up you life. I am telling you it can be done!!!
No body on this earth is worth your soul, and continuing to indulge in fornication and sexual immorality has eternal penalties.
Purity is not a religious choice but it is something I choose to do to show God how much I love Him and I love myself!
For my young ladies, please please please, I beg you wait!! Sex really not running away and your vagina won’t spoil (sorry to be so forward)!!
It is so possible and it is so worth waiting on GOD to send you a husband who will honor you by marrying you before sharing your prize possession.
GOD IS SOO FAITHFUL …. HE WORKS ALL THINGS TOGETHER FOR THOSE WHO LOVES HIM!!
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| Who Son sets free is free indeed!!! |
God loves you so much… and I do too:-)
To God be the Glory****
Crystal
Feel free to email me: shachene@gmail.com
I'm not so lucky to have anyone to talk to. I'm an only child and I bare have close friends, so most of my thoughts or pain is kept to myself. But I have a question or questions that I would like to ask. I've never been in a relationship so I really don't know what to expect when it comes to one.
1. How can you discern if a guy just wants you for sex and not a serious relationship?
2. Also if he shows no intention of wanting to let his parents known that you and him talk (because he doesn't want anyone in his business) what should you take from that?
3. Do you think that at a certain age a man should possess a certain civil and mature behaviour? In terms of being respectful to a woman, alcohol consumption and know that sex is not everything and that love needs to be shown in other ways.
4. Also if a man keeps hanging around men younger than him don't you think this would affect their trend of thoughts on life seeing that these young individuals are not at that level where they are ready to get a house, married or be a family person?
These are just somethings that are on my mind that I would like to get an answer to.
I'm not so lucky to have anyone to talk to. I'm an only child and I bare have close friends, so most of my thoughts or pain is kept to myself. But I have a question or questions that I would like to ask. I've never been in a relationship so I really don't know what to expect when it comes to one.
1. How can you discern if a guy just wants you for sex and not a serious relationship?
2. Also if he shows no intention of wanting to let his parents known that you and him talk (because he doesn't want anyone in his business) what should you take from that?
3. Do you think that at a certain age a man should possess a certain civil and mature behaviour? In terms of being respectful to a woman, alcohol consumption and know that sex is not everything and that love needs to be shown in other ways.
4. Also if a man keeps hanging around men younger than him don't you think this would affect their trend of thoughts on life seeing that these young individuals are not at that level where they are ready to get a house, married or be a family person?
These are just somethings that are on my mind that I would like to get an answer to.
Yay!