Today officially marks three months since Omar Tucker became my husband and I feel like I am still processing the fact that I am actually a wife. Like, Mrs. Tucker in real life! LOL… Sometimes I still have to remind myself that this is my life, that I am somebody’s wife and that I now have a husband and two bonus daughters to think about while still running my business, serving my clients and trying to execute all my Quarter 4 plans.
I promised that I would give you all an updated blog by our three-month anniversary, but so many things have been happening that I honestly did not feel ready to sit down and write again. I am still adjusting to married life, learning what it means to share a home with a man for the first time and whew…. finding my rhythm in this new season. However, people have been asking questions, especially since yesterday, when Mr. Tucker and I were interviewed on one of Jamaica’s top television stations during their morning show to talk about our love story, so I figured it was time to give you all an update.
I have so many things I want to blog about, including our wedding day, our honeymoon, what it has been like moving in together and the realities of blending our lives and families, but today I want to talk about something that has generated quite a bit of interest whenever people hear our story: why my husband and I waited until our wedding day for our first kiss.
So, let’s jump into it!
How I First Heard About Waiting Until Marriage to Kiss
I honestly did not know about the idea of waiting until your wedding day to kiss until many years ago, when I was following Heather Lindsey and came across her blog about waiting until her wedding day for her first kiss.
Back in 2013, I was struggling with fornication and as a church girl who genuinely wanted to please God but was struggling to put what I knew into practice, I started Googling questions like, “Why should I not have sex before I get married?”and looking for practical ways to stop having sex outside of marriage. That was how I stumbled upon Heather Lindsey and let me tell you, I was hooked! I became a big fan because she spoke openly about the things many of us were struggling with but did not always feel comfortable discussing in church.
However, when I read her story about waiting until her wedding day for her first kiss, I remember telling my friends that would NOT be me. LOL! I was determined to abstain from sex because I understood that sexual purity was part of my commitment to Christ, but I did not think kissing was such a big deal, and I certainly could not imagine being in a relationship with someone I was attracted to and not kissing him until our wedding day.
At the time, I thought I understood what it meant to honour God with my body, but I had not really considered how other physical boundaries could affect my ability to remain sexually pure. I understood the instruction to abstain from sex, but I had not thought much about the decisions and situations that could make keeping that commitment more difficult.
Looking back now, I can smile because God really does have a sense of humour. Here I was telling my friends that something would never be me and years later, I would find myself not only agreeing with the idea but actually living it out in my own relationship.
October 10, 2025, I Was Single…. October 10, 2026, I Am Married!
Let me pause the story right here because I need somebody to appreciate the goodness of God with me!
Today is October 10, 2026 and exactly one year ago, on October 10, 2025, I was VERY single, with NO prospective husband in sight. I was not engaged, I was not planning a wedding and I certainly was not preparing to become Mrs. Tucker within the next few months. Yet here I am, three months into marriage, writing about the man God allowed me to marry.
Watch God!
Amos 9:13 speaks about a season when things happen so swiftly… and while I know that Scripture speaks within a particular prophetic context, I cannot help but think about how suddenly God can change the circumstances of our lives.
If you are single and trusting God for marriage, I want to encourage you not to allow your current circumstances to convince you that nothing is happening. I know what it feels like to desire something and not know when or how it will happen, but I also know what it feels like to look back and realize that a year can make such a significant difference.
Now, back to my husband and our first kiss!
How a Dating App Conversation Led to a No-Kissing Agreement
I officially met Omar on the dating app on October 18, 2025, although he had been messaging me a few days before that. As we developed a friendship and became more intentional about getting to know each other, it became clear that neither of us was interested in playing games, because we both desired marriage and wanted to approach the relationship with purpose.
When Omar officially asked me to court him on November 29, 2025, we signed a courtship contract that outlined some of the commitments we were making to God and each other, including an agreement that there would be no sex before marriage and no kissing either.
Now, I need you to understand something: we were both very clear that we would wait until marriage to have sex, but as our conversations developed, Omar began sharing that he felt convicted about establishing even stricter physical boundaries because he wanted to protect his sexual purity. For him, that included not kissing until our wedding day.
And honestly, it felt good to be with a man who desired to please God and honour me, because this was not a situation where I had to convince him to take God seriously or persuade him that our relationship needed boundaries.
I also want to make it clear that we did not make this decision because we were trying to look good, impress people or create a testimony that would make us seem more spiritual than other couples. If we are being honest with ourselves, we were both sexually experienced before we met and we were very attracted to each other, so we knew that remaining sexually pure would require more than simply saying that we would not have sex.
We had to be realistic about our desires and recognize that there was a possibility that we could compromise if we did not establish boundaries that helped us honour our commitment. We were not pretending that the attraction was absent and we were not trying to prove that we were stronger than temptation; instead, we were acknowledging our humanity and choosing to put practical safeguards in place.
Why We Decided That Sex Was for Marriage
One of the things we both understood was that sex was designed by God to be enjoyed within marriage and this conviction was important to the way we approached our relationship. Hebrews 13:4 reminds us to honour marriage and keep the marriage bed pure, while 1 Corinthians 6:18–20 calls us to flee sexual immorality and honour God with our bodies.
I have come to appreciate that sexual purity is about more than avoiding a particular act; it is also about understanding God’s design, respecting the person you are building with and making decisions that reflect your commitment to Him even when your desires are strong.
I also believe that sex can complicate the process of discerning whether someone is truly the right person to marry, because physical intimacy can create a strong attachment that makes it harder to evaluate a relationship objectively. When the physical connection becomes a major part of the relationship, you may find yourself overlooking incompatibilities, unhealthy patterns or concerns that you would otherwise take seriously, because the attachment makes it difficult to imagine walking away.
For us, the goal was not simply to arrive at our wedding day without having sex; it was to build a relationship in which our decisions reflected our desire to honour God, even when doing so required sacrifice and discipline.
Why We Chose to Wait for Our First Kiss Too
I know that some people may wonder why we felt the need to extend the boundary to kissing, especially because many Christians believe that kissing is perfectly acceptable during courtship as long as it does not lead to sex. I understand that perspective and I am not suggesting that every Christian couple must make the same decision we did, because different couples may establish different boundaries based on their convictions, temptations and circumstances.
For Omar, however, the decision not to kiss was connected to his desire to protect his sexual purity and I respected that conviction because I shared the desire to honour God in our relationship. We knew we were attracted to each other and rather than waiting until we found ourselves in a difficult situation to decide where the boundary should be, we made the decision beforehand and agreed to honour it together.
There is something powerful about being with someone who is not only attracted to you but also cares about your spiritual well-being, because it means you can have conversations about difficult things without feeling as though you are fighting against each other’s values.
Of course, that did not mean it was always easy, because we were two people who were attracted to each other and looking forward to the day when we would finally be husband and wife. We still had to be intentional about how we spent time together, the situations we placed ourselves in and the boundaries we had agreed to maintain, because a decision made in a moment of conviction still requires discipline when temptation shows up.
I believe that was one of the most important lessons we learned during courtship: it is not enough to have good intentions if you are unwilling to make practical decisions that support those intentions.
Wedding Day…..
Listen….. on Friday July 10th 2026, when Pastor Bolt pronounced us husband and wife and said, ” You may kiss the bride”…. Mr. Tucker wasted not a second to make up for the months of not kissing me (LOL)!! I literally had to pull away for him to stop …. it was sooo funny!! My maid of honor had to run to wipe off his mouth with the amount of lipstick on his face…
Waiting to kiss on our wedding was soo beautiful for both of us:-) It was so worth the wait. Now, we are the kissing Tuckers!!!
What I Want You to Understand About Our Decision
I am sharing our story because I know there are people who are trying to honour God in their relationships and are looking for practical ways to do so, but I also want to be careful not to make our personal conviction a rule that every Christian couple must follow. Waiting until marriage for our first kiss was the decision Omar and I made after considering our own convictions, our attraction to each other and our desire to remain sexually pure, and it is something we are grateful we chose.
If you are dating or courting, I encourage you to have honest conversations about physical boundaries before you find yourselves in situations where emotions and desires make those decisions more difficult. Talk about what purity means to both of you, be honest about the areas where you may be vulnerable and establish boundaries that reflect your convictions rather than simply copying what other couples are doing.
Most importantly, invite God into the process and be willing to obey Him even when His direction challenges what you previously believed or what you would naturally prefer. I once thought waiting until the wedding day to kiss was something I would never do, but God used my relationship with Omar to show me that sometimes we grow into convictions that we previously did not understand and when we are willing to surrender to Him, our perspective can change.
And yes, we really did wait until our wedding day for our first kiss, so I suppose I owe Heather Lindsey a little credit for introducing me to the idea all those years ago! LOL.
For now, I would love to hear from you: Would you have considered waiting until your wedding day for your first kiss and what do you think about the decision Omar and I made? Let me know in the comments, because I am always interested in hearing different perspectives, especially when we can have honest conversations about faith, relationships and what it looks like to honour God in real life.
Please follow our journey on Instagram — our page @tuckersbuiltbycovenant and my personal page @crystalsdaye.
I love you and God loves you more!!
Thanks for reading 💛
Crystal
Feel free to email me: crystalsdaye@gmail.com